Singleness is not a curse

Saturday, December 4, 2021


The Iwas Sawi Project is a collaboration of Marcelo Santos III and Rhadson Mendoza. It is my first book from Santos and probably the second book from Mendoza. Written in Taglish, the book caters to the interest of young people, adolescents, or teenagers, and maybe also to everyone who loved and was loved.  

It contains tips and account of their personal experiences about heartbreaks, specifically in the area of romantic relationship. Some of the contents reminded me of the encounter I had with a guy online. It was an unpleasant experience in general. I thought it was all bliss but I was heading in the wrong direction. I was led and willingly complied with whatever happened in the conversation between us. I even wrote poems about him. I am regretting it a little as days pass by after that encounter. I thought I would definitely have pleasant memories about him or the experience, but no, it wasn't.

I was blinded by my selfish desire and almost trudged on the path of no return. Almost. Just almost. I was happy, but whenever I look back on the memories all I can sense is a dark cloud that covered me from the light. Like I got almost separated from the light of the lamp which serves as the navigator of my life. I almost got lost again. 

But I will always be grateful for the light, to the only true light.

The lies and deception of a person even in a virtual setup do not minimize the gravity of its negative impact on the person being lied to or even to the liar himself. It will have its consequences one way or another. It will come after you and no one can stop it. Forgiveness is the only way to move forward while trusting the process.

I learn to forgive myself and others from the One who forgave and redeemed me from everything that dragged me down.  

And now, I am still single at the age of 31 and I am loving it. I am more joyful about the fact that I am single and that can never be rooted alone in my own effort, rather there is great satisfaction coming from the One who can only fill the void inside me. I never thought I could ever be this joyful in this season of my life even if everything isn't perfect or the way I wanted it before because in the first place nothing is ever perfect in this world we live in. 

Despite the imperfection, I am blessed.

Singleness or being single is not a curse, it is never a curse. It is a blessing we all experienced in a season of our lives and for some in the entirety of their lives. A blessing! 

So if you are the type who is not in a relationship right now, has never been in a relationship, or just do not have the intention to be in a relationship romantically, it is totally fine. No judgment! Do your thing, whatever is within your control.

I remember Paul's story and his take on singleness, which I just read a few days ago in the book of 1 Corinthians 7:25-40. I believe it was a reminder from God that singleness is also a blessing because He knows exactly what I was going through the past months and it felt reassuring like there is peace in my heart and mind. 

There is a purpose in our singleness and that alone can bring trust and faith from the One who made us wonderfully. The frustration is fading away and I am enjoying the process more so I am trusting the process because I know that there is someone greater than me who is in control of everything. Forever grateful to Him!

I hope and pray that you get to see your purpose in times of uncertainty because there is also someone who is always certain and will never ever change. He loves and did everything to take you back to Him, and be assured that He still working on you just like what He is doing on me. Focus on Him, you'll never be lost. You will always be found, always. 

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