Showing posts with label wander. Show all posts

We Are Heavenly Bodies, Are We?

Tuesday, November 21, 2023

What if the governing entities of this NASA are heavenly bodies who want to return home? And they have been doing it since humans barely learned how to get out there, in outer space. They have been trying to put themselves back in the heavenly realms yet until now they haven't fully discovered the most efficient and effective way to return where they originally come from.

Or maybe, we as humans always have that intense desire to return home, to the heavenly realms. We, ourselves, are heavenly bodies and we're just trying to make it back home in our own way, in our own time, in our own effort.

These were just a few of the many thoughts I had when we visited NASA Space Center in Houston, Texas.

I was excited and so looking forward when there was a plan to go there, well, except for the unexpected expenses that might go beyond my budget but I had no choice but to take risk or else I wouldn't be able to visit it on my own because I had no car and the more the merrier.

All I could see were pictures and realia and souvenirs, and I was not enjoying it. I was looking for something that could make me experience what it was like to be in outer space. My expectations were too high.

We continued to roam around the Space Center and finally something caught my attention. I saw people sitting comfortably on a makeshift chair for astronauts. The two persons were looking on their own monitor as they felt how it was like to be seated on a skyrocket that was about to take off. The vibration added to the experience of the take off. There was a short line waiting to experience the same and we also did wait for our turn. I liked it. I enjoyed it.

We got to tour the facilities while riding a tram of the actual working area where they practice the astronauts and develop equipment and machines that would help the human race to further have access to outer space. A life size skyrocket ship amazed by how huge it was.

So what if humans really are heavenly bodies? What if we're originally from outerspace and we so desire to go back where we belong, to return back home? Just think about it, we might be the aliens of this world and the native dwellers are the animals we rule over with. What are odds!

A Time To Be Lonely

Monday, November 6, 2023

Her eyes were filled with water from the heavy rain drops of life's joy and pain. Overwhelmed, she tried to hold up the tears in the corners of her eyes. Wishing time would stop and save her from the rush of emotions that was about to trample her defenses. But instead of fighting back the tears, she surrendered and let the rain fall down on her cheeks, on her face.

As the tears poured out, shame and guilt were nowhere to be found. Instead, she was freed, she was at peace, she had joy.

Tears persistently trailed down on her cheeks as she stood up in front of her class. Shocked, her students asked, "Are you okay, miss? Why miss?" Concern was evident on their faces. She was too stunned to even give them a response.

"Please, give me a minute." She pleaded and turned her back from them.

Inside the room safe from the eyes of the young ones, she wept and wept as she completely surrendered to the raging time of loneliness. As if that loneliness demanded to be felt, to be released. She thought to herself now was not the right time, "Damn it!"

Yet, it was the perfect time, not according to her, but according to the One greater than anyone. "Probably, now is the time to be lonely," she thought to herself again.

A few moments passed, she returned to where the young ones were.

"Are you okay, miss?" They asked again, once she made it to where they were.

She replied, "Yes. I'm okay, maybe I just missed home."

"Aww, miss..." Some gently interjected, as they group and side hugged her.

"You okay, miss?" Some asked again.

"Yes. I just missed home." Sincerely with a smile on her face, she replied.

Little Woman in a Little Forest with a Little Dream

Saturday, October 21, 2023

It was the long weekend I so looked forward to. I did not plan to be grand. Staying at home was the first thing I had in mind when I learned that there would be a long weekend in our district this October. Giddy and excited, the meaningful and purposeful days passed by in almost three weeks. I listed down in my journal the things I needed to accomplish. I started my to-do list and was successful with some of them.

Watching movies and series is one of the hobbies I get to enjoy ever since I was a child, yet that joy seems nowhere to be found now. I have been wandering and looking for a movie or series that can bring back the spark and joy in watching cinematic art.

My wandering in the land of streaming and binging brought me to Tubi, an on demand video streaming app. The shows on Tubi appeal to my interest.

The South Korean movie 'Little Forest' caught my attention and awakened the dormant joy I had whenever I watch a movie.

The female lead was a familiar sight. Cute was the first word I would describe her. Her whole demeanor was a breath of fresh air.

The changing season in a small rural area in South Korea is like bringing colors to the black and white scenery of life.

The cold winter comes with sadness whereas a blooming spring brings hues of hope to the loneliness of the little woman. The summer heat pricks the skin of ignorance from the fickle-minded little woman. The falling autumn journeys with the wind as it goes along to the course of life and suffering.

Time makes the seasons change. Time makes little dreams come true. How time works is simple, yet the most difficult to understand with just our feeble human minds, without wisdom it is impossible.

The Little Forest is me, or maybe you.

Live With A Grateful Heart

Monday, October 16, 2023

I have nothing to write. I only have been posting once a month for the past three months and it also has been busy months. I have not finish reading a book. I have no motivation to post my thoughts at all. It feels like a repetitive cycle for me. Perhaps, I have lost interest in my own thoughts. Probably, nothing compels me to share anything on this blog.

I am nothing but grateful to the Lord for all that I am. Yet there is that one thing that has been bugging me even though I surrendered it all to Him. I gave up already even on the idea of having it or experiencing it. But it keeps coming back, the desire to have it, the desire to experience it. I avoid to be greedy just to have it, to possess, and experience it to the fullest.

Or maybe I need to be greedy?

I always ask God and he never answers me with a 'no', it has always been wait, wait, and wait. I do not want to sound impatient, but when is it my Lord, until when I am going to wait.

Shameless as I can be, there are times I feel like I really do not need it, I really do not like it yet there are also few times I yearn for it that I even talk to God and question Him of His time, will, and ways. How shameless I am!

There are things in life that can be a two edged sword from the human perspective. What meant to be good for you can hurt you sometimes and what you thought is good for you may cause you pain that lasts longer than it is meant to stay.

Dwelling on such thing that needs to undergo season of waiting until it is fully riped can definitely bring anxious and ungrateful thoughts. And those kind of thoughts are the last thing I want in my life right now.

The act of gratitude can save us from a lot of pain. Just being grateful even for the little things in life can help us overcome anxious thoughts. This may not come in an instant. It takes time, practice, and change of lifestyle, but we will surely get there if we have faith.

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭94:19‬ ‭CEV‬‬

And when I was burdened with worries, you comforted me and made me feel secure.

Oh Lord, guard my heart and mind.

Protect me from my own devices.

Give me a grateful heart every single day of my life.

Amen.

Work Matters and So Are You

Tuesday, September 5, 2023

Work matters so are you. Life is work. The work itself is work. I am not just talking about the 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. work time or whatever required duration of time your company or employer wants to see on the log. It is more than an employee-employer contract work kind of thing.

Work is a gift from God. It is a blessing. When I was a student, I used to look at work as a resource which is really the entirety of its value in the human economy. Once I have work I can buy, I can do what I want.

Then, I graduated from a state university with a degree, they say it is a ticket to a better job and good life. I got hired and the salary was getting us by. I was grateful I had that job but I kept on searching for a stable job where I could get a better paycheck.

Three years after graduating from college, I did get a stable job with a decent paycheck. I was happy for myself and my family. I dream of the best life for my parents and sister. I want the best for them, and for myself, life has to offer.

During my first few years in my stable job with a decent paycheck, the dream job started to be a burden. At some point, I felt ungrateful. The work became a cross I had to carry like it was some sort of punishment, and I did not like what I felt about my work. The joy of doing it got lost along the way. The passion and dreams I once had for my work were nowhere to be found during the first five years in my job.

The purpose of the job was a source of money so we could buy our basic needs. A resource to get us by in our everyday needs. I was able to get what I wanted, oh yes I did. After getting my wants, I was happy, but it was only temporary. It never lasted and my wants were never satisfied.

We were just surviving and we were barely living.

I wanted to find the joy and spark in my work. I did not want to go on doing what I did feeling it was a burden I completely wanted to put off my shoulder. I wanted to carry the burden with joy and hope that even though things got hard everything would be alright at the end of the day. I sought that joy and spark in my work.

There was something lacking in my work, that was why I was not satisfied or seeing the value of my work. Do you have any guesses as to where I found it?

I found it in God. Cliche as it sounds or superficial as it is, I cannot deny that reality in my life. He made my life brand new. He refreshes my soul as I get to know Him more and more. I have found not only the joy and spark but also the purpose of my life, and why I do what I do.

Ahead is not an easy road. Unpredictable things may happen along the way, and work might feel like a burden big time. I can only pray and hope for you and me that get to see the worth and value of our work through God's perspective. That our work is part of His good plan in our lives.

Work can get hard and annoying sometimes, and this book I just read entitled, Work Matters, serves as one of the many reminders, I get from God that I even brought it here in my new workplace. I would also like to remind you that more than work God cares for your first, your well-being. He wants to be purposeful, joyful, and hopeful with the work He assigns to us.

Our God-given work matters and so you are, first and foremost. Whenever you feel tired and drained from your job, come to Him and you will find rest.

Through You Nothing is Impossible: Show Me Your Glory

Friday, August 11, 2023

As far as I can remember, July 21, 2023 was the date of the very first concert I went to, and I was glad it was Planetshakers 2023 Concert in Manila.

It was never planned. I was sad and feeling down and just stayed at home for three (3) or four (4) days straight. I was like hibernating and contemplating at the same time about the future when my sister in Christ, Mitch, sent me a message thru Messenger. She had extra ticket for the concert, since her companion was not available due to emergency situation so she needed someone to take her place, and I immediately said yes. It was timely and purposive. God's timing is purposeful.

Watching a concert of Planetshakers has been on my list of things to do since 2018, I think. Yay that it finally materialized this year.

More than the fun and excitement throughout the concert, it was a blessing. For Christians, it might be a cliché to say that I felt blessed during and after experiencing the worship concert. My unexpected attendance in the concert was like a push or a pat on my back I badly needed at that time. Thank God I had extra budget. I was feeling uncertain of the big decision I just made in my life, that decision was a leap of faith. Until now, I am still waiting for the result of that decision and there are times I am worried and anxious even though I already have surrendered the result to the Lord, still I cannot help but be anxious sometimes.

Do I lack in faith when I worry?

I pray that God will give me faith that I need to overcome this season of my life. I pray to completely surrender everything to Him. I pray to holistically entrust to Him every aspect of my life. I pray and I pray. Sometimes, it does not make sense. I feel stuck and cannot move on. Still, I hold on to His promises, the deliverance and that this too shall pass because through Him nothing is impossible. His glory will prevail and be shown for all the earth to see. Nothing is impossible.

Speech, Adlibs, and Glory to God

Monday, July 24, 2023

hehe

K to 12 Graduates: Molded through a Resilient Educational Foundation

(Gradweyt ng K to 12: Hinubog ng matatag na Edukasyon)

A pleasant and blessed afternoon to all.

I want to take this opportunity to honor each one of you who have gathered for this special event, to our:

School Division Office Representatives,

Principal,

Teachers,

Canteen/Utility/Security Guard Personnel,

Parents and guardians, and

Students, the Completers of this Moving Up Ceremony.

This memorable day is possible because of the small and big contributions of everyone, and I am so glad to be part of this unforgettable event in the lives of our children--your children.

Just to give you a bit of an addition to my introduction and why I am here.

I am Arlene Cahanap Manocot, an alumna of Applied Academics for Excellence Annex I Aplaya National High School. I am a second child. My father is a welder, "vulcanizer", and tricycle driver. My mother is a vendor and was a street sweeper. I come from a humble background.

I was a shy and timid student back when I was in high school. My shyness was worse during my first and second years, I was a novice in recitation and reporting in front of the class. It was a huge dilemma for me back then, but I guess even now.

I can still remember some of the things I did because of this ‘shyness’.

· Pretended to sleep because I did not want to participate in the recitation and to report in front of the class – 1^st yr.

· Monologue incident – 2^nd yr.

I must say that high school life is one of the unforgettable times of our lives, and I know that most people here would agree, right?

I was in 3^rd and 4^th year when I made the decision that I need to improve, I must overcome my fear of recitation and reporting. I was barely coping back then, but now that I realized it I am pretty satisfied with the progress I had made during those last two years in my high school days. I was able to stand in front and report to the class while my hands were shaking and feeling numb at the same time, my voice also cracked. I clearly remember embarrassing and small victories in my life as a high school student, such nostalgia. Indeed, high school life is a thrilling rollercoaster ride.

And after 17 years… who would have thought?

That the timid and shy student back then would be a teacher, writer, and business owner.

This Moving Up Ceremony with the theme K to 12 Graduates: Molded through a Resilient Educational Foundation (Gradweyt ng K to 12: Hinubog ng Matatag na Edukasyon) signifies the hardships and success of all the people gathered around here. This is victory!

Resilient, Education, and Foundation are the keywords that we can identify in the theme of this year’s Moving Up Ceremony.

Parents/Guardians. You are the Foundation.

Family is the basic unit of the society. It is where it all began. Learning starts at home. It is the core foundation of every person. The collective atmosphere of a community is directly related to the condition at home. Parents play an essential role in molding the future of our students.

One of the hardest jobs on earth is being a parent, a job that does not even pay you. It is the most demanding job a human being could ever sign up for. It is not monetary compensated, but you do it any and every way you can.

And you remain to be a strong ‘foundation’ for your children, the future of the next generation. I could only hope and pray that you as parents and guardians train up your children in the way they should go; even when they are old they will not depart from it.

School. You deliver free and affordable quality Education.

Education is a great equalizer, no doubt about that. For a person like me, who come from a not well-off family, I am grateful to the Department of Education and PUP Santa Rosa Campus and Santa Mesa Campus for delivering free and affordable quality education, and to my parents for sending me to school even though I did not want to.

But the school has to be reminded that the learning process is not limited to the four corners of a classroom. These students can also learn from others not only from their teachers. There is a vast of unlimited knowledge, skills, and abilities to learn out there. Be more open to possibilities that they have to engage in an independent and collaborative learning process where they can be themselves, free from unnecessary restrictions unless it is for their safety.

I could only hope and pray that in the near future, the Philippine educational system will cater to the ultimate essential learning needs of our Filipino students.

Students. You be Resilient.

Resilient, according to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, is the ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change. But most of the time it is not easy. It is hard, difficult, and sometimes even impossible.

In real life, pain is inevitable. Failure is waiting for you. Rejection is just there waiting beside Failure smiling at you. That is part of life and we have to learn to accept that.

So, students, our dear completers, do not be afraid to:

Make friends, surround yourself with wise and good people.

Make mistakes but make sure to own up to your mistakes.

Take risks but be ready for the consequences.

Dream big but handle rejections well.

Forgive or forget, then move on.

Embrace the process. Be patient. Enjoy the season of waiting.

Celebrate little and grand victories.

Heal from your past and traumas.

Keep moving forward.

Be humble. Honor your father and mother.

Life is not easy, again. But I welcome you to the next chapter of your life.

Congratulations to all the completers! May you never give up on your dreams!

Live life with a purpose!

For He Knows That I Have Come To Know

Saturday, May 20, 2023

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
Psalm 139:13 ESV

For He knows

God already wrote His plans and purpose in our hearts and souls. In our mother's womb, He already knew us. He imprinted a blue print of His plans and purpose in our lives. He meticulously engraved every detail in our DNA. Long before we even realize it, we abide in Him as He abides in us, and it is such a liberating moment to finally carry the burdens willingly or on most occassions surrender them all to the Lord and let His amazing awesomeness be magnified and glorified.

Sometimes His plans and purpose in our lives are difficult to accept or even to comprehend. It is humane not to submit since we want control over things that relate to us. We freak out if things get out of control, and again it is humane. Surrendering is connotated as a weak word and most of us do not want to be seen as weak as if it is a taboo. We prefer to portray a strong, brave, and iridescent character. Who does not want a strong, brave, and iridescent character?

I believe that the true esscense of strength, courage, and iridescence comes from Him. The wisdom we get whenever we pray, read, and meditate His words gives us the access to genuine and gentlest form of strength, courage, and iridescence. Therefore, it is a must that we seek wisdom from Him.

Look what I found on the website of Acronym Finder, HOLY BIBLE stands for He Only Left You Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth, which really makes sense since a lot of self-help books that contain instructions on how to deal with life occupy spaces of physical and online bookstore. There is high demand on self-help books as if everyone is so clueless on how to go on with life and I cannot deny the truth in the idea that we are really, most of the time clueless if we do seek true wisdom.

That I have come to know

Along with this journey called life, sometimes or most of the time we all get to have our own dreams and plans crafted from or motivated by the fallen world we all live in. We own them like we were the source of the creation. We own them disregarding the real Creator. But the Lord always has the final say. If they are aligned to His plan and purpose there is a big chance, a miracle even, that He will redirect and repurpose our "own" plans. He has his ways, greater than ours.

I have dreams. Or should I say I had dreams? Some of them, the lesser ones I was able to realize and some of the big ones I decided to forget and not to pursue.

Perhaps for the big dreams that I considered, I did not have the courage to pursue them. Yet. Perhaps, the time was not right. Yet. I was afraid of failure. I did not want to accept that I lacked in many things: finances, talent and skills. Like it was not really for me, yet I forced it instead of actually pursuing it.

The decision to stop pursuing dreams was a bruise on my pride, and it was never an immediate acceptance. It was a long process of struggle whether I stop or put them on hold. And I did stop and put them on hold. I was hurt, pained, and humiliated by my own doings. I felt victimized of my own self-assault. I was hard on myself, unforgiving. Like if I did not get to have or be it, then there was no sense of living. I was on track of proving my worth to the world. The same world that would continue to exist without me in it.

Right now, I am just amazed by how God is putting me back on track of pursuing the old dreams and plans I have, and that I have come to know that my plans and dreams abide to His purpose. Every good thing takes time. I could only pray and seek His wisdom. Everything has its season and when it is time to let go and move on to the next season, I could only pray that I have yet give up because there are countless times that I wanted to give up. It is all thanks to God that I am here.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Jeremiah 29:11 ESV

This is 33: A Year Older, A Year Wiser

Wednesday, May 3, 2023

A Year Older

Last April I turned a year older. That is a belated happy birthday to me! Yey! I was not able to post anything on my blog last month. Sigh. I tried to, but it was never posted. I started and was not able to finish those supposed to be blogpost on the month of April. A little disappointing but manageable.

So, May started. We are now in the beginning of this year's second quarter. Life is hard and never easy, yet we are able to be living and breathing up to this point. I am happy for you and me. We are alive and trying are best to stay grounded and continue thriving.

I am a year older, but I do not feel old. This must be what 33 is. I feel young, maybe one of the reasons is my daily encounter with my students. They are playful, and sometimes naughty or difficult to deal with, but that is what youngsters do. They are who they are, it is part of growing up. They do what they are supposed to do. It is a phase where adults need to be patient and understanding towards them, to build relationship through communication towards mutual respect.

Now, I feel like getting older from all the things I have said. I never thought I would have that kind of realization. I had this thought that I am selfish and uncaring towards others. As I grow older, I have come to realize that I can also be selfless and caring to others in my own ways, and there maybe times that my act of selflessness and caring will be misinterpreted by some. I have to improve on that I think, but I no longer burden myself with unnecessary worry or doubt.

A Year Wiser

Am I a year wiser? I do wonder, yet I feel like I am and I know that I am. There is an improvement that is for sure. With the decisions I made and I am making, I think I am a year wiser. I wise up in terms of my financial and social skills. My spiritual health is improving. My relationship with God has been better, and trusting Him that it will get even more better as I grow wiser. I have come to love teaching and learning with my students. It has been a long journey, twelve (12) years in teaching, thirty three (33) years of sojourning in this life. All I can say is thank You, Lord, in good times and bad times. I still have a long way to go.

I do not have too much, but I have enough. God is so gracious in providing my needs, my family's, and the people close to me.

I do not feel good all the time, but I know that my future is in His hands. He takes care of me.

I maybe doubting sometimes, but He is my assurance. Life can get hard as it is, yet His grace and provisions are here to stay.

I am expectant and hopeful for the plans He has for my life. I pray to serve my purpose in this life according to His will and I know it is not easy sometimes, and again life can be difficult as it already is.

Life still has its beauty, even though there are more down times, rather than high time.

Life can be enjoyed, despite the trials and tribulations.

Life is not a race, so do not be in a hurry.

A life with Him is a life of joy, peace, love, trials, and tribulations! It is a not a strom free life, but a storm proof life. Storm proof at 33!

P.S. For those who are curious, yes, I am 200% girl, female, from the lineage of Eve, and other names or labels you can think of. I am a queen and a princess.

Love Chooses, Love Stays

Saturday, March 11, 2023

Does love really? Does love choose? Does love stay?

What if people leave, does it mean there is no more love?

What if people stay, does it mean there is still love?

Well, how can I know if there is love in the first place? How do I know what I have is love? How do I know what I feel is love? Is there a structured step-by-step process to know if love exist? Is there any clue that will lead to the right and perfect answers to all these queries inside my head?

Questions after questions only lead to more questions.

Sometimes love can be the most confusing abstract idea we can ever deal with, but there are also times when love, and its power, is the only thing that can provide clarity.

Choose

Living is making choices. We are constantly choosing and choosing, either we are doing it consciously or not. Life is a choice. Cliché as it may sound, it is a fact. Making choices is one of the building blocks of one’s human life. We experience domino effect every time we choose. Consequences are the results of our choices. Good choices may lead to good consequences and bad choices may lead to bad consequences.

Logically speaking, having the right wisdom is an advantage in making good choices. We made wrong choices and suffered bad consequences. I made ones and I welcomed regret along with the pain attached to it. We made right choices and enjoyed good consequences. I made good ones I guess and I was at ease with joy or sometimes I doubted if I deserve the joy from those good consequences.

Is there any love among the choices we have made in our lives so far? Are we motivated by love every single time we make a choice?

Know love and choose love, always, and I am aware how hard to choose it always.

Stay

We have no choice over consequences, but we have control over our choices. Consequences are about to befall upon us even if we try to avoid them or put a barricade around us. They are the results of our choices. Whether we prefer to run away or face the consequence, the end game is that it will only run after us. It will never stop chasing after us. So face and deal with it. Stay, never leave. Once we know the true meaning of love, stay, and stay in love.

Stay. Stay, and accept the consequences of our own choices. Stay, and learn from the consequences of our own choices. Stay, and believe that the wrong choices we made are not that hopeless.

There is hope, so stay. Please stay. Do not leave.

Are we to stay or leave?

You should stay. We should stay. Never leave. Please.

Everything is unclear if we do not have the knowledge of the certainties. Life itself is full of ambiguity, full of questions. No one can be certain of the future if we put our belief into something that is as temporal as this world that we live in. We make choices every day, and sometimes I think it makes more sense to choose to leave this world, rather than to stay. Sometimes, there is that strong desire within us that engulfs our whole being to no longer want to stay, to choose to leave and never to stay.

Sounds like running someone wants to badly run away. Do we? Do I? Do I badly want to run away? To choose leaving, rather than staying. But I should stay, we should stay, and never forget that we are chosen. He stays with us in love. Love chooses, love stays. He chooses and He definitely stays.

even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love
Ephesians 1:4 ESV

Congratulations Lacey Williams! Thank you for joining the giveaway. I will send a message to your email about how to claim your prize, please look forward to it. Thank you again.

Love Listens, Love Obeys

Sunday, February 19, 2023

I have nothing concrete to share on this blog as of this moment, I am going with the flow of my thoughts right now, though, I have a concrete title for this blogpost and that is Love Listens, Love Obeys. I keep on talking about love and love on this season of love in the month of February. Love Scars, Love Heals is my first entry and Love Hurts, Love Waits is the second one.

I ask myself: Do I have the slightest authority or even the right to write a post about something under the context of Love Listens, Love Obeys?

I do listen. I do obey. But to what extent? Am I doing enough for love? Love in all its forms: Agape, Storge, Philia, and (never mind) Eros.

Love listens

Geb.tv explains these four (4) types of love found in the Bible as:

Eros (never mind) is romantic love.
Storge is love between family members.
Philia is brotherly or sisterly love, or love in friendship.
Agape is the unconditional love or the love that God has for us.

It is nice to know these kinds of love, but what to do with this knowledge. What can change knowing there are different kind of love?

First, Eros is not the only kind of love to be pursued in this world. It is never the end goal of life’s purpose. Romantic love is good but it should never pressure anyone to be in a romantic relationship that supposed to lead the involved persons into marriage.
Second, Storge and Philia are related and shared the same context to the second commandment: to love your neighbor as yourself, and it is succeeded by the first and greatest commandment: to love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.
Lastly, God’s love for us or Agape serves as a reminder of the greatest blessing He has given to mankind and that is grace, the gift of Salvation through Jesus Christ.

Love obeys

Love is not just a good feel. Love is an act. Love is active, proactive. Love endures in good and bad times. Love is difficult and painful, but there is still beauty and kindness in love.

Love is patient, love is kind, it is not jealous; love does not brag, it is not arrogant. It does not act disgracefully, it does not seek its own benefit; it is not provoked, does not keep an account of a wrong suffered, it does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; it keeps every confidence, it believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

1 Corinthians 13:4‭-‬7 NASB2020

It is easy to describe love, but the hard part is manifesting the fruit of love, the byproduct of love. Saying I love you Lord is as easy as A-B-C or 1-2-3. Not listening and obeying sometimes or most of the times makes me feel like I am not enough to love or be loved at all.

I wonder if I am listening and obeying enough to prove my love. Am I enough or am I putting too much pressure on myself and doubting my worth? I am caught up with the idea of not being and not doing enough for love: my love for God, for my family, my friends, and my work.

“If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.

John 14:15 NASB2020

To love is to listen and to obey. Love is not deaf, it listens. Love is not passive, it obeys.

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Love Hurts, Love Waits

Friday, February 10, 2023

A growing restlessness pesters me these past few days, if I may say, since February, the love month on planet Earth. The atmosphere around me screams love month. During our In-Service Training at school, one of the speakers never missed integrating the idea of his singleness in some parts of his talk, which hit a mark on my part. I am reminded of my own singleness, until now I have never been in a relationship with an earthling, which now is not an issue in my life. I have learned to understand the joy in singleness. I have learned to accept the possibility of growing old alone. This may sound miserable to others and they are never wrong. I respect their opinion because once or many times in my life I thought I would be miserable growing old, alone, with no one to share.

It must have been nice to experience going on a date, receiving fresh flowers, watching movies, walking in a park, feeling the warmth of a hug, having that deep connection with another earthling, and a whole bunch of things to do together on an ordinary or extraordinary day. But I know, we know, that relationships are not a bed of roses. Instead, a relationship is a roller coaster ride full of ups and downs, a maze that leads to confusion and being lost. It has good and bad sides. There is pain and joy.

Love hurts. Sometimes it hurts so bad I do not even want to think about it. I am turning two threes this year and yet the existence of unrequited love still permeates my vocabulary. How easy it would be if the earthling I like likes me back and actually pursue me. Voila! Happiness overload, in my dreams. Not in a million years it will happen. It did not happen and it will never. Not in this lifetime. Am I being hopeless by saying that? Yes, or maybe no. Time like this love stings a little bit, knowing that I am someone who is never pursued. Recently, there were times I was asked when I would have a boyfriend or get married, jokingly I got back at them by saying in the next lifetime.

The future is still a mystery and I am glad to enjoy the gift of the present. I may be longing sometimes for a companion, an Adam in my life, but the longing shall soon pass every time. It goes by. The hurt goes by. God never let it stay. He listens to my afflictions, to my cries. He knows my needs. His timing is perfect. Most of all, He gives the best for me. It may take a lifetime or someone may never come along the way, and I am sure it may be hard to understand His plans with my feeble human mind, but He is the only one to trust. It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man (Psalm 118:8). If He wills him, he is on the way. Love waits, when the time is right, the Lord will make it happen (Isaiah 60:22).

Love hurts. Love waits. Every 'no' is God's redirection towards His best for me.

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